Swede 101


Hej !

Here are a few things I think you need to have to be one step closer to being a swede. As well as benefits of being a swede. I will probably mix them up. We can also say I have been paying close attention to the swedes and almost studying them…I’m no creeper though. Just saying.

So here we go. The swede starter pack.

1. Own a bicycle. Which then means you should know how to ride one because literally everyone owns a bicycle or two. Your conversations will most likely be about how your bike got stolen last week and not how you need to get your car’s radiator checked.

2. Own a pet….scratch that, own a dog. They are a man’s best friend and the typical swede knows that only too well.

3. On that note, you should then own a Lint roller. Especially during winter when your dog is shedding. You do not want your visitors going home covered in your pup’s fur. That is, of course, if you want them to visit again.

4. A great bum, great legs how about we just say an overall fit body? All that cycling around guys, it is inevitable. Never seen so many white people with great bums in one place. I must say I felt compelled to work out. or rather SQUAT!

5. Which then means, you best own a pair of trainers and working out gear for that run in the morning around the lake and the one in the evening through town.

6.Apparently swedes insist that you take off your shoes at the door. We do that back at home too…It was normal for me. However, some people got offended, but now you know. Leave your shoes outside!

7. Make a new friend today, get along great, even go out for fika and remind them to kiss their dog for you….Make sure you ignore them tomorrow! Yes, like you never ever met them. I don’t get this one.

A girl literally pretended to never have met me ,EVER ,before that morning in class. But unless I was smoking some cheap stuff that same girl was on my flat the weekend before, yapping about some political issue and made all of us listen to her! She was even wearing the same yellow pilot shirt that she wore that day to my flat! Plus how do you forget one of the few African girls in the entire school? Yes,obviously I was very disturbed, don’t judge me. *just realized this is unrelated to why they don’t talk to you the next day, but I had to get it off my chest*

8. Fika is swedish for a coffee date. It would be very swede of you to have plans for Fika at 4pm…sorry 16:00 , tomorrow or the day after, any day this week or twice.

9. You will confuse me if you say 10pm…please 22:00 . Tack sa mycket.

10. Learn to be shy. You have to be if you want to pull this off.

P.s not all swedes are shy…it is a stereotype though that some of them hide behind to avoid talking to you. I’m not being mean ,neither are you…I can totally see why you wouldn’t want to talk to the girl in bantu knots.lol I’m not being sarcastic either…..on the flip side, this is just in their culture that it is hard to break the ice with them the first time….get to know them though, Amazing souls!

11. You have to be kind and accommodating. Again not all swedes are but for this one I have to say MOST of them are….otherwise I don’t even know how I would have gotten to Sala if it wasn’t for this virtue.

12. Tack! It means thank you. Always say Tack…it is polite. Tack sa mycket for thank you very much, just to show you have some command of the language.

I might be dropping this back home…it rolls off my tongue so easily now,don’t hate me dear friends.

It is 12pm , 24:00…as I write this and I cannot think of anything else at the moment but I think that’s more than enough for a basic starter pack. Are you swede? Can you think of any others? Share!!

Tack och hej da 🙂

Have a lovely day guys,

love and love,




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