So i have to do a post about this title too. I know it might be a little too much when i just started this blog but i guess we can say i am fired up about it? Or i have a lot of time on my hands?or just maybe i want to get in as much writing now so that it compensates for the days that i don’t leave you a love letter here? I read numerous blogs and i get so frustrated when the writers do not keep me constantly fed with new information. I totally understand though…there are so many things people have to do other than blogging and i know the “bloggers sickness” shall attack me too so this is for those times when i am not able to say hi?

So then let us get to it.

The C-Word. You know how people do that to words? Like completely shorten them and leave just but the first letter and then add “word” to it? And they usually do that with words that are “not meant” to be said out aloud either because it is “bad manners” or people are not too comfortable just openly saying the word?

Well…that’s where i got the concept from but mine was more like when Lord Voldemort had to be called “The dark Lord” other than his actual name. You see he was all evil and all that bad stuff that it was just better not to say his name. It is the same with cancer. I hate her so much…maybe it should be a “he”? What pronouns are given to diseases anyway?

Him,Her,It….you can choose.So anyway…Cancer. I am sure i am not the only one having this hate relationship with cancer and I am just praying that they find a cure, in my lifetime or thereafter but at least before the world ends? And well if that happens tomorrow then I guess it was just a long shot.

Cancer can be defined simply as a disease caused by an uncontrolled division of abnormal cells in a part of the body.

Leukemia= a malignant progressive disease in which the bone marrow and other blood-forming organs produce increased numbers of immature or abnormal leukocytes. These suppress the production of normal blood cells, leading to anaemia and other symptoms.

Leukemia is a type of cancer.

Leukemia helped death claim my mummy’s life.

So yes,,that’s why Cancer and that’s why that title.

Appropriate?I think so 🙂

I am quickly just going to type another post now, so sit tight?



As i break my blogging virginity, thank you for having me wordpress. Hopefully we can build a sweet sweet relationship and i can upgrade from having this free website? Hopefully.

And now to you my readers( Hoping that i have,will have readers) only the warmest greetings as i venture into this world of blogging.Hi!

I would like to quickly point out that i will be using this blog as some form of release, therapy whatever you may . It might,,probably will, get very emotional but please do not mistake it for being a pity party. My intention is only to write genuinely and from the heart not with holding anything,this way it feels like I am talking to someone and just offloading baggage from my heart and my mind. See I am on this losing belly fat journey and “manage stress” is one of the “to do” things in order to be successful.But i digress, the point i am trying to make is that through this blog i am able to offload thoughts,worries, fears etc that may cause me stress. I have to say that mostly emotions especially related to death and cancer.

I guess you can say this is how i am dealing with it.

So yes, no pity parties. I am okay..i really am…but sometimes the tsunami tides are real and i might just need to be a tad emotional you know? Also i know that this is not something unique to me, it is a universal struggle and thus i am hoping that i can relate with those that are walking through a similar dark tunnel and just need to hear they are not alone that someone out there (me) is going through the same thing. We are in this together? i hope so.

I do not think ANYTHING  I have said so far relates to the title of this post so we need to add in a few sentences here to justify its place? So yesterday i was rambling on twitter throwing emotions all over the place (until today that was my “release” platform) and my friend Sally tweets me and goes ” @Barbiebrizzle(yes that is my handle,so weird, i know) start that blog then. Whatever it takes 🙂 ” What i picked from that was “JUST DO IT.” In upper case because it felt like she was nudging me to take the step. The step towards healing and recovery and letting go. Or she could also just have been finding a way for me to take my ramblings elsewhere, anywhere that was not on her news feed. (is it called a news feed on twitter? I have been using Facebook so much of late because it is a thing in Sweden.) But i know Sal and i am positive it was the former , she just wants the best for me. Sally thank you!!

I couldn’t think of a better time to actually start this blog than the 1st Of December 2014, well the important thing is the month. December is where it ended and started. We might or might not walk back 6 years when it REALLY started, we shall see.

I am not sure whether this blog will take a turn from cancer but if it does, then a name change will be in order.

Otherwise just to welcome you all to my platform if you are all about that emotion and gay stuff.

love and love,